It's the beginning of the new year, so you know what that means...people making resolutions! Some people believe in them and others don't, and I understand why each feels that certain way. As for me, I think there is nothing wrong with striving to make some positive changes in your life. Even if they don't last until February, at least you tried. You can't achieve anything without trying first, right?
So that's why I (and others, obviously) make resolutions.
I usually fall short of mine, so I'm hoping that me writing this post and putting it out into the universe may help me accomplish them. That, and I'm sure I have some of the same as some of you reading this!
I love reading through other people's resolutions, especially when they're super personal and give you a good insight into who they are. So I figured I could to that for you all :)
In 2018, my resolutions are...
to Purge Material Things
I'm a neat freak. I know I am. It's a blessing and a curse because yes, my apartment may always be clean, but I also can't relax or focus on anything else if it isn't clean. So if it's my designated writing time (see this post for further explanation) but I know there are dishes in the sink, I can't focus on the writing itself.
So that's where a purge comes in.
Of course, I won't be ridding myself of dishes, but for other things that cause clutter? It's time to go. I don't think I'll be able to handle a fully minimalistic lifestyle, but I would like to take some inspiration from it. I will keep trinkets and random things that make me happy, but that purse I never use from three years ago? It can leave.
Not only will it calm my anxious mind, but I can also donate the items or sell them via Facebook/an app/Plato's closet which will leave me feeling cheerfully generous or with some spare cash.
It's a win-win.
to Stand up for Myself
For someone with a Pinterest board filled to the brim with inspirational quotes, I'm notoriously bad at standing up for myself. At nearly twenty-five years old, I still let myself be treated as a doormat. It's lame and as pathetic as it is unhealthy. My fear of confrontation and rejection keeps my dignity from shining through, and it's time for it to stop.
I'm a grown ass woman.
I need to demand that I be treated as such.
to Promote Myself More
This sort of ties in with standing up for myself, but is more geared toward my writing. I may have briefly touched on my fear of self-promotion in my post about a book signing I did (which you can read here), but unfortunately, it's still an issue.
I've been writing for over a decade now, yet I still blush anytime someone brings it up. I'm terrified that posting anything about my book on social media will come off as boastful and gross. I worry that people will think that because my book wasn't an overnight success, that I failed. The self-doubt is terrible, and the way I let it affect me is even worse.
I wrote a book, got picked up by a publisher, and achieved one of my life dreams.
I need to be proud of that.
My first step? Shameless self-promotion right here on this post!!
Love romance books? Or coming-of-age stories? Or the new adult genre? Check out my book here!!
to Treat my Body Better
It's one of the most cliche and overused revolutions for a reason.
I'm lucky enough to be genetically predisposed to be thin. My entire family is society's definition of "normal". But instead of settling in that easy place, I want to be better. I want to treat my body better. I want to eat less gross stuff, and to feel good about what I put into my body.
Now rest assured, I am a carb freak. Give me a loaf of bread and some butter and I'm a happy girl. That will never change. But nowadays I realize I need to balance that out with a carb-less dinner here and there. Or some yoga in the mornings.
Something that will make me proud of my health.
to Not Be Afraid of Being Hurt
My number one fear in life isn't death, or spiders. Or anything normal.
I know everyone's afraid of it, and everyone hates it. But my entire life has revolved around my fear of rejection. I've not tried to be friends with people or even tried not to be better friends to my friends. I've not truly opened myself up to anyone, and like I mentioned before, I'm nearly a quarter of a century old.
How sad is that?
My relationships, those platonic, familial, and romantic, have suffered because of it. And that's not okay.
to Go Easy on Myself
This may seem a bit counterintuitive since most of these resolutions are about bettering myself, but still. I am my own worst critic and I need to chill out. Even if I have the most productive day, I'll still beat myself up about that one stupid thing I didn't achieve that day.
I need to go easier on myself and give my mind time to rest. Everyone needs a break now and then. I have to remember that.
to Stop Seeking Perfection
As of when I'm writing this post, my perfectionist self is the main reason my creative writing has been suffering. Now that I've been published and have somewhat of a real, true audience, nothing I write seems good enough.
I can't get out of my head and realize that nothing, especially not the first draft of something, is going to be perfect.
It's a writer's worst enemy.
to Save Money
This resolution really needs no explanation.
to Journal More
In March of 2017, I started getting into the whole bullet journaling craze. I got the right notebook, the colorful pens, and the tiny little metal ruler to keep my lines perfect. For a few months, I was obsessed. And I did feel as if it lessened my stress. Instead of keeping mental tabs on every little thing I needed to do, I had it written down.
I think my attempts at perfection are what screwed me over here as well. None of my pages looked as good as the ones I saw on Instagram or Pinterest. I've always known that drawing and art have never been my specialties, but for some reason seeing that every day when writing down my tasks bothered me.
So I want to get back into it and remember the good it did for me instead of focusing on the bad.
That's why I made this entire page for my 2018 resolutions! (Totally took inspo from Pinterest on the layout, btw).
to Write More
I'm a writer, and I cannot tell you the last time I felt like one. Like I mentioned before, I've been too caught up in my own insecurities to truly enjoy my writing like I used to. It's incredibly depressing too, and something I've been trying to work on for months now.
It's just easier said than done.
So hopefully me working on the mental resolutions I mentioned above will help this out as well!
And there they are: my 2018 resolutions! Hopefully you all enjoyed getting to know me a little bit better. If not, maybe you picked up some resolutions for yourself! Or, if you don't believe in resolutions, maybe you just realized some little things you need to work on. I know I did by writing this entire post.
I hope you all have an incredible 2018, and remember that self-love is just as important as any other kind (if not more)!